Valentines Day Jokes


Q: How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend? A: He gave her a ring.

Q: What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? A: I’m sweet on you!

Q: What did the boy owl say to the girl owl on Valentine’s Day? A: Owl be yours!

What would you get it you crossed Odie with the God of love? A stupid cupid!

What did the valentine’s day card say to the stamp? Stick with me and you’ll go place

Q: How many sheep does it take to make one sweater? A: Depends how well they can knit.

Q: Why did the banana go out with the prune? A: Because it couldn’t get a date.


Q: What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? A: Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?

Q: If your aunt ran off to get married, what would you call her? A: Antelope. __________

What did the French chef give his wife for Valentine’s Day? A hug and a quiche

What did one light bulb say to the other? I love you a whole watt!

Q: What did the valentine card say to the stamp? A: Stick with me and we’ll go places!

Q: What did the painter say to her boyfriend? A; I love you with all my art!

Q: Who sends a thousand valentines cards signed’, guess who’ ? A: A divorce lawyer. _______________

Checkout: Good Luck Jokes

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